I should’ve learned that those around me are people too
and they will be moved by the thoughts and feelings I hide.
They could empathize if I could give them the time, and I try
to be open, but I hold myself back and I’m sheltered and scared of being attacked.
I should’ve learned by now that it’s not all about me.
The things I think they’re laughing at are things they can’t see
and they really don’t care about that one thing I said and didn’t mean.
They can’t understand the world I see, and I’ll never know the world they percieve.
I should’ve learned by now that my body is mine
and I have the right to say ‘no’, and I can go if I don’t want to stay.
And no one else has any say in whether or not it’s okay
that I would rather wrap up tight alone in my own bed to night.
I should’ve learned by now that memories are scary,
but though they might scare me and scar me they are not part of me.
They are nothing but words, and yes, words can hurt and words have power,
but they can be erased, and changed, and interpreted in some more constructive way.
I should’ve learned to get over what was done to me, when I was a kid.
and accept this ignorant, innocent, idiot is me, like it or not, though I’d rather you did.